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Posts Tagged Aging

How to Tackle Online Dating in Your Golden Years

Tuesday , February 18 , 2020

How to Tackle Online Dating in Your Golden Years

Are you over 60, newly single, and looking to mingle? You may have noticed that the dating world has changed quite a bit over the last few decades.

Gone are the days of meeting through friends or marrying your high school sweetheart. Making connections at work happy hour or the church social are things of the past.

These days, people meet online. And in a world where we bank, shop, and set appointments from our computers, doesn’t that just make sense?

While online dating may sound daunting, it’s a total game-changer. Finding love online puts all the power in your hands, allowing you to “browse” the options before making any decisions.

And if thousands of other adults aged 60+ are doing it, why can’t you? All you need is an open mind, the ability to navigate some very basic technology, and a positive attitude!

Ready to jump in? Here’s what you need to know:

Choose the Right Dating Site
With so many dating sites out there, you may not know which one to choose. Our tip? Vet a few (specifically targeted at seniors) before you choose one or two to join.

Most sites will offer a free trial before they make you officially sign up. During that time, you can browse members to see if they seem like your type, note if they seem to be active, and (depending on the site) even message a few people.

Not sure where to start? According to Mashable, the top eight senior dating sites are:

• eHarmony
• Match
• EliteSingles
• SilverSingles
• Zoosk
• OurTime
• Senior FriendFinder
• SeniorMatch

Be Honest
When it comes to the internet, people tend to only post the very best things about themselves: The most attractive photos, the wittiest quotes, the happiest announcements.

But that’s not real life.
If you’re hoping to start a quality relationship with someone new, it’s best to start off on the right (honest) foot.

Post current photographs that show what you look like now (not when you were 20 pounds lighter or 10 years younger). Share your actual interests (not made-up hobbies that you think will make you look interesting). And, most of all, be honest about what you want (whether that’s a long-term committed relationship, or a casual fling).

Be Realistic
The over-60 dating pool keeps growing larger and larger as people live longer, healthier lives – but it’s still fairly limited.

If you go onto a dating site with very specific requirements (i.e. has a good pension, owns a home, and still has all his own hair), you may end up sorely disappointed.

Of course, you want to be attracted to the person you end up dating. But keep in mind, if you are dating someone in your own age range, there is likely to be evidence of that age. Don’t let a few (or a lot) of gray hairs turn you off!

Start a Conversation
Some people have a hard time starting a conversation in real life. The internet can be even worse – especially for a generation that didn’t grow up around technology.

Take the time to read other people’s profiles and pick up on their interests and desires. Likewise, make sure your bio has enough information about you to prompt others to ask questions or start a conversation.

Once you get the ball rolling, keep the message exchange moving until you can have a real, honest-to-goodness conversation.

Set a Date
Of course, the ultimate end goal of online dating is usually to meet someone in real life.

Once you’ve exchanged several emails or phone call and have determined that you find someone interesting, it’s time to grab a coffee.

Experts recommend having your first face-to-face in a neutral, public place. Tell a relative or friend where you are going to be and who you are meeting and choose a casual activity like breakfast or lunch.

After the date, make sure to follow up (email or text is fine) and don’t be worried if you didn’t feel any chemistry – there are other fish in the sea!

Keep browsing, make more connections, and enjoy the ride!

Posted in: Aging

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Dating In Your Sixties (And Beyond)

Monday , February 10 , 2020

Dating In Your Sixties (And Beyond)

St. Valentine’s Day is right around the corner and love is in the air.

If you’re a single senior who’d like to jump back into the dating pool, you’ve come to the right place! This week’s blog is all about romance and relationships . . . after the age of 65.

Dating in Your Sixties (and Beyond)

Some seniors are looking for love after losing a spouse. Some are divorced. And some – lifelong singles – have decided that they’re ready to settle down.

No matter the circumstances, dating as an older adult can provide some unique hurdles.

For one, there really is no precedent for dating later in life. Past generations simply didn’t live as long, “gray divorce” wasn’t really a thing, and widowers didn’t typically jump back into the dating scene.

Today, people are living much longer. If a spouse passes away at 70, their partner may feasibly live for another 10 to 20 years (or more). Many individuals don’t want to be without romantic love for that long.

The result? Many older adults are trying to navigate a world of romance that is VASTLY different than it was 50 or 60 years ago (we’re looking at you, online dating sites).

In addition, they may have to work around health problems, mobility issues, lack of transportation, a limited budget, and more.

What’s a single senior to do? Try out these easy ideas.

How do Older Singles Find Love?

Just like singles of any age, seniors can meet in a variety of ways.

One of the easiest is to be “set up” through friends or family who may know a suitable match. It’s likely that your senior friends know plenty of other people in the same age range – many of them widowed or divorced and looking for love.

If you’re not into the idea of blind dates, though, there are plenty of other ways. Here are some of our favorites:

• Hire a matchmaker: While this may seem old-fashioned and “out of date,” hiring a professional can take a lot of the headaches out of meeting someone new. They know you, they know what you’re looking for (and what you’re not), and they may know EXACTLY who to introduce you to.
• Check out the community center: Signing up for activities at the local community or senior center provide a low-key way to get to know other people. Worst case scenario? You make some new friends. Best case? You bond over your love of parcheesi and meet your next great love!
• Don’t be afraid to say “hi”: Next time you’re at the coffee shop or library, strike up a conversation with someone of interest! Even if they’re not single, it’s a fun way to meet new people and create connection.
• Try your senior living community: Do you live in an independent living or assisted living community? Chances are, many of your neighbors are single – and living nearby makes it much easier to get together without relying on others for rides.
• Enlist your children: Do you have adult children? Chances are they want to see mom or dad happy and would gladly act as wingman. Find out if they have any friends with single parents or if they know anyone through work or other activities!
• Go online!: All the kids are doing it. Why can’t you? Today, there are dozens of websites (like OurTime or Silver Singles) aimed solely at helping older adults meet. Not sure how to navigate the online world? Ask a younger adult for help!

Be Patient

Dating in your golden years isn’t quite as easy as it is in your twenties. For one, the dating pool just isn’t as large. For another, you’re likely to be FAR pickier at 65 than you were at 25 (and good for you – you should be!).

Finding the right match might take a while. And that’s ok!

Looking for “the one” can be fun. Get out, try new things, have fun, and meet lots of people.

And remember – even if you’re lonely, it doesn’t mean that you’re alone. Friends, family, and acquaintances can provide companionship and keep your days busy and full!

Posted in: Aging

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Cold Weather Dangers for Older Adults

Monday , February 3 , 2020

Cold Weather Dangers for Older Adults

Did you know that a healthy adult can develop hypothermia in temperatures as high as 50°F?

Fifty degrees doesn’t seem very dangerous, does it? Most of us could comfortably go outside without a jacket in that sort of weather (at least for a few minutes).

During the winter season, though (even when the weather is abnormally warm, like it has been so far this year in New Jersey), prolonged exposure to cooler air can cause the body temperature to drop below normal – a condition known as hypothermia.

At older ages, and especially among the elderly, the dangers of hypothermia become greater and even a small drop in temperature can lead to serious consequences, including death.

Here’s what you need to know:

Why Are Older Adults at Higher Risk for Hypothermia?

 

Anyone can get hypothermia and most people will recover from a mild case with little to no side effects. For people aged 65 and older, however, the risks are much greater? Why?

  • The elderly have a lesser ability to regulate and control body temperature
  • Older adults have a more difficult time sensing environmental cold
  • Certain medications and illnesses can make it more difficult to regulate body temperature
  • Poor nutrition/not eating enough can leave older adults more vulnerable to the cold
  • Older adults have a diminished sense of thirst and are often dehydrated, even in winter
  • Many older adults are on a tight budget and can’t afford to properly heat their homes

Cold Weather Safety for Older Adults

 

Despite a predisposition to being more susceptible to cold, it IS possible for older adults to stay safe, healthy, and comfortable during the winter months. Here are some tips for keeping warm:

  • Maintain a temperature of at least 68 – 70 degrees Fahrenheit in the house.
  • To save on heating bills: Close off rooms you are not using (close vents and shut doors in these rooms), keep the basement doors closed, make sure blinds and curtains are tightly shut, and consider using weather stripping on windows.
  • Dress warmly on cold days, even if you are staying in the house.
  • When you go to bed, wear warm pajamas, socks, and a hat. Consider investing in flannel sheets and extra blankets.
  • Make sure you eat enough to maintain body weight – less fat under the skin makes it more difficult to maintain temperature.
  • Avoid drinking alcohol
  • If going outside, make sure to dress appropriately in layers of warm, light clothing, an appropriate coat, gloves, hat, scarf, and waterproof shoes. Avoid going out in excessively cold or stormy weather.
  • Ask friends or relatives to check in on you regularly during cold weather months.

Tip: If you are going to heat your home with a space heater, read Reducing Fire Hazards for Portable Electric Heaters and Seven Highly Effective Portable Heater Safety Habits from the Consumer Product Safety Commission. It is important to understand that many portable heaters can pose a fire or carbon monoxide risk.

Warning Signs of Hypothermia

The symptoms of hypothermia can mimic many other conditions and can be difficult to pick out – in yourself or someone else.

Sometimes, the best indicators come from the environment: Is the house cold? Is the person not dressed appropriately for the weather? Are their shoes or clothing wet?

If there are no clear giveaways, look for these common signs:

  • Cold hands and feet
  • Pale skin
  • Puffy or swollen face
  • Shivering (not always present)
  • Acting sleepy
  • Slower than normal speech or slurred words
  • Being angry or confused

More serious symptoms may include:

  • Slow heartrate
  • Shallow breathing
  • Moving slowly or being clumsy
  • Losing consciousness

What to do if Hypothermia is Suspected

If you suspect that you or someone else has hypothermia, call 911 immediately.

Until help arrives:

  • Move the victim to a warm, dry place (if possible)
  • Limit movements to only those that are necessary – do not rub or massage the person
  • If their clothes are wet, remove them and cover the person with warm, dry blankets or coats
  • If they are conscious, give them a warm beverage to drink
  • DON’T apply direct heat (hot water, heating pads, etc.) as it can damage the skin or, worse, cause irregular heartbeat

Posted in: Health

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